Wild Flowers & Shooting Stars

In memory of

Wes

March 1985-May 2011

For Heaven's sake...

"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it careful round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket- safe, dark, motionless, airless- it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable... The only place outside Heaven where you can be safe from all the dangers...of love is Hell."

-C.S. Lewis (The Four Loves)

Great Awakening...

"Then Jesus lifted up His eyes, and seeing a great multitude coming toward Him, He said to Philip, 'Where shall we buy bread, that these may eat?'

...

"Philip answered Him, 'Two hundred denarii worth of bread is not sufficient for them, that every one of them may have a little.'"

John 6: 5,7

I shared with a friend this week that I felt like the disciples in this story just before Jesus multiplies the fish & bread. In fact, when I shared it with him, I was exactly in Philip's shoes. Acknowledging the reality of my unbelief startled me but I didn't run away to hide. Instead I just sat there, by Jesus, not really knowing what to say. My friend asked me if I had yet presented what I had so God could multiply it.... hmmmm.... No, no I haven't. "Why ever not?" I thought. Conviction. Correction. Still more silence. More sitting at His feet, quiet, not wanting to be a fool but rather wait for the truth to surface. The answer came to me today. As I was driving home I asked "Why hadn't I presented You with what I had?"

"'Cause you were afraid it wouldn't be enough", came the response.

Sigh. Sometimes I can be so foolish.

I got home still thinking about it. Got online to check e-mails, fb, etc. and I came across a picture from my pastor in DC. He is in Arizona at the moment and the pics were of the "cathedral rock climb" (rock formation in shape of a cathedral thousands of feet above sea level... it looks pretty cool). Anyways, one of the pics had the caption: "Calling on heaven. God spells faith: R.I.S.K."

:)

I smile because God is good.

Have you gotten the truth that was revealed to me yet?

Philip was afraid they didn't have enough. Maybe he was afraid people would get angry and hurt them (5,000 hungry, cranky ppl can be alarming). Or maybe he was scare the multitude would be disappointed. Who knows. The thing is he was uncomfortable and he wanted Jesus to dissipate that which made him uncomfortable (Luke 9:12) . But Jesus wants to teach him to walk by faith, not by sight.

A mentor of mine has a saying: "If you want to be a person of impact, you cannot be afraid of the collision."

There is always a measure of risk in following God but we cannot be afraid of it, we must embrace it. We must call on Him who gave us the vision to supply for the need. It was Jesus who made Philip aware of the need, and it is Him who supplied for it. He always knows how He will supply, even before He makes us aware of the need ("He Himself knew what He would do" Jn 6:6). He just wants to tests us through the process, that we might be purified... that our understanding of Him would expand, increase. He wants to take us outside of our box, that we can enjoy His limitless power and grace.

May God bless you today and embrace you in the power of His love ;)

Have a great day!!

Lectures...

It is hard not to be afraid. It takes energy to stand fast and wait. I hear people talk about waiting as if it were a mindless act. It makes them feel lazy. Lazy?! Are you kidding me? It is exhausting to stand here still, trusting. How can one feel lazy when one has to constantly fight the inward battle of letting go of one's controlling tendencies and allow God to do the work He wants to do.

I feel sad for those who wait and are judged by those who don't. It is hard work indeed to get one's self out of the way AND... stay out!

The Countdown Has Begun

To everything there is a season,

A time for every purpose under heaven:

A time to be born and a time to die;

A time to plant, and a time to pluck what is planted;

A time to kill and a time to heal;

A time to break down , and a time to build up;

A time to weep, and a time to laugh;

A time to mourn, and a time to dance;

A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones;

A time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;

A time to gain, and a time to lose;

A time to keep, and a time to throw away;

A time to tear, and a time to sew;

A time to keep silence, and a time to speak;

...

He [God] has made everything beautiful in its time..."

Eccl. 3:1-7, 11a

I am happy to announce I am going to England!!!!! The preparations have begun. It has been a long journey in which God has shaped me & mold me more into the image of His Son. There has been a great testing of faith but at last things have started to take on a more definite shape.

So let me bring you up to speed.

Right now the church in England with whom I will serve is in the process of getting a Sponsorship License. What is that? Well, since 2009 the immigrations laws in the UK changed, and a new scheme was set in place. Any entity wanting to bring immigrants over must have this special license with the government according to the type of activity the immigrant will be doing (working, religious, sports & recreation, youth mobility and on goes the list). It is, of course, a lot of paperwork & rather long process (at least a few months). But the pastor is hopeful I will be there by the end of June :)

After the church secures a tier 5 sponsorship license (that's for religious workers), they will be able to issue me a sponsorship certificate. Once I have my sponsorship certificate I am one step closer to apply for a religious worker visa. The sponsorship certificate is what ties me to the church so that the immigration agency knows where I'm going, what I'm doing and who am I accountable to while I'm in the country, it is assurance that I'm not a random immigrant wanting to live off of their government help.

There are two other things that must happen before I am able to go. I must have an established 1) Support Team & 2) I must have proof that I can support myself in England for the 2 years I'll be living there (otherwise my visa won't get approved).

1) A support team. If there is anything God has taught me while being back in the States is that this mission needs to be backed up by the body of Christ. This is a team effort!!! YOU, my prayer partners who support me & love me, staying connected with me and up to date on what is happening ARE the backbone. This step of faith is yours as much as it is mine. THANK YOU!!! Thank you for laboring with me and taking ownership of the work as we trust God to bring about His promises.

2) Finances. This is very straight forward. Part of the supporting documents needed when I apply for a 2 year religious worker visa is bank statements that prove I in fact have the funding necessary to live in the UK, since I won't be allowed to earn an income in their country. The estimated cost of living in Southampton for 2 years is $35,836 (USD). This includes rent, utilities, food, transport and phone.

Prayer Request:

- For Calvary Chapel Southampton to get the Sponsorship License in a timely manner, that there wouldn't be any delay or hurdles.

- For all of my finances to come in the next couple of months.

-To stay focused and encouraged in this time of waiting.

Thank you, thank you, thank you, for all your love and support!! Your prayers move mountains! :)

On Loving & Growing...

"I have not spoken in secret, in a dark place of the earth; I did not say to the seed of Jacob, 'Seek Me in vain'; I, the Lord, speak in righteousness, I declare things that are right." Isaiah 45:19

Lately I'm getting into gardening. This little ones you see in the picture were planted about... 2 weeks ago? They are huge now but in this picture they had only been planted for 4 days... The longest four days of my life. It might sound silly, but when I planted this seeds, I would pay them a visit every morning & every night staring at them for a good few minutes to see if I could discern any green coming out. Perhaps I was trying to will them to come out with my gaze. On the third night of my usual staring my mom started to laugh, told me to leave them alone, that they wouldn't come out at least for another few days. I didn't care, I stare for another minute or two and went back to bed- there was absolutely no sign of sprouting. Then in the morning.... Gasp!!! They were there! The seeds had sprouted!! Joy!!!!!

Only 8 hours before there was no sign of life and then, voilà.

This experience reminded me of God's faithfulness. How God watches over His word to fulfill it. Even if we forget, He does not. Even if we falter He does not. Even when nothing seems to be moving forward, He is at work, and in His time He will bring it to pass.

His name be glorified!!!! :)

PS- I have no idea why everything is underlined...lol... I tried to figure out how to take it off to no avail... I guess everything I'm saying is important, lol ;)

Charis

"For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourself; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast." Eph 2:8